Blog dedicated to my favorite series and #1 in all the world, DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES. I hope you like it. This is for you. Desperate Housewives Curiosities, Quotes, Photos, Spoliers, Confessions (Made for you) and more.
Desperate Housewives Things
  • Carlos: What the hell were you thinking?
  • Gabrielle: Uh, depends. What have you heard?
  • Carlos: I got a call from the church. They said you attacked Sister Mary!
  • Gabrielle: Yeah, that's about right.
  • Carlos: What are you thinking?
  • Gabrielle: I wasn't, but I was thinking about it on the way over here. And I realized the ass I should be kicking is yours.
  • Carlos: Mine?
  • Gabrielle: Yes! Sister Mary manipulated you into threatening me, but you're the idiot that fell for it.
  • Carlos: I was not threatening you. I was asking for a promise.
  • Gabrielle: You made a promise, Carlos, a long time ago: till death do us part. And one day you just come home and start throwing words around like annulment. How do you think that makes me feel?
  • Carlos: Okay, I'm sorry about that. I need to have a child.
  • Gabrielle: And I need to know I'm the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with, not just some uterus in high heels.
  • Carlos: Gabrielle, please.
  • Gabrielle: No, Carlos, I am sorry. I am not gonna be blackmailed into giving birth. You have to choose. And I wish you would do it so I can move on with my life.
  • Carlos: Well, of course I choose you.
  • Gabrielle: I think that's the right decision. You know, I made a decision, too. The answer to your question earlier is yes.
  • Carlos: Yes...
  • Gabrielle: I wanna have a baby. I wanna have a baby with you.
  • Sister Mary: Money can't buy happiness.
  • Gabrielle: Well, sure it can. That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep 'em from rioting.
  • Sister Mary: Carlos is a diamond in the rough, a flawed man to be sure, but someone who is desperately searching for something to believe in. To satisfy your materialism, he ended up breaking the law. To deal with your adultery, he resorted to assault. As long as he's with you, he will never find what he's looking for.
  • Gabrielle: Well, I guess he should have thought of that before he married me.
  • Sister Mary: Some marriages are meant to be annulled.
  • Gabrielle: What the hell kind of nun are you? Look, if you try to come between me and my husband, I will take you down.
  • Sister Mary: I grew up on the south side of Chicago. If you wanna threaten me, you're gonna have to do a lot better than that.
  • Gabrielle: You listen to me, you little bitch. You do not want to start a war with me.
  • Sister Mary: Well, I have God on my side. Bring it on.
  • Sister Mary: Money can't buy happiness.
  • Gabrielle: Well, sure it can. That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep 'em from rioting.
  • Sister Mary: Are you two involved in any charities?
  • Gabrielle: Currently? No.
  • Carlos: But we should be. I mean, let's face it Gabby, buying more stuff isn't gonna make our lives any better.
  • Sister Mary: Exactly. Money can't buy happiness.
  • Gabrielle: Well, sure it can. That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep 'em from rioting!
  • Carlos: Gabby!
  • Gabrielle: It's a joke. Lighten up.
  • Carlos: Can you believe this? I'm married to a woman so selfish, she makes fun of the entire concept of charity.
  • Gabrielle: You are a hypocrite. The money you spent to buy your sports car could buy a mud hut for every peasant in Ecuador.
  • Carlos: Ok, you're right. But I'm evolving, starting right now. Sister, I would like to donate my car to your mission.
  • Gabrielle: What?!
  • Sister Mary: Carlos, are you sure?
  • Carlos: Absolutely. Gabrielle and I don't need two cars, we can share one.
  • Gabrielle: Share? What if you have the car and I need to go shopping.
  • Carlos: We're gonna cut back on shopping too.
  • Gabrielle (yelling): Ok, I think we should all just calm down a little bit!
  • Sister Mary: Carlos is a diamond in the rough, a flawed man to be sure, but someone who is desperately searching for something to believe in. To satisfy your materialism, he ended up breaking the law. To deal with your adultery, he resorted to assault. As long as he's with you, he will never find what he's looking for.
  • Gabrielle: Well, I guess he should have thought of that before he married me.
  • Sister Mary: Some marriages are meant to be annulled.
  • Gabrielle: What the hell kind of nun are you? Look, if you try to come between me and my husband, I will take you down.
  • Sister Mary: I grew up on the south side of Chicago. If you wanna threaten me, you're gonna have to do a lot better than that.
  • Gabrielle: You listen to me, you little bitch. You do not want to start a war with me.
  • Sister Mary: Well, I have God on my side. Bring it on.